Work in-depth with our team and your family members for a four to 10-day intensive specifically designed to address your family’s needs.
Many family members wonder: “Where is the line between helping or enabling?”
An urgent cry for assistance or rescue coms from the loved one: “My car got impounded; it wasn’t my fault. Can you pay for me to get it out?” Family members respond ranging from “Oh God how will she get to work?” to “I can’t believe she’s pulling this kind of crap again” and everything in between.
In customized family intensives, as in multi-family workshops, we learn the difference between “unconscious enabling” (the most destructive form) and clear-minded decision-making. In the service of helping their loved one, family members often act on impulse, caught in a fear-based subconscious story. “I’m keeping her alive,” or “He’ll relapse if I…” are two of the more common stories. By gently examining how and why families make decisions, members can more reliably navigate toward a thoughtful, balanced response that makes sense financially, interpersonally, emotionally and spiritually.
Exaggerated, Hostile and Chronic Dependency are explained. Attendees will be guided to find a sustainable posture, or psychological position, from which to consider and respond to the requests and actions of their loved ones. Established on such a footing, family members become empowered to say their truth without guilt and second guessing. Embracing these concepts, readers move from enabling to relating, from fear-based reacting to confident and centered responding.
FRI designs and facilitates multi-day healing gatherings for a single family designed to focus on the specific needs, difficulties, and conditions requiring care and attention. Typically, multiple generations attend, though it is not necessary for all family members to accept the invitation. Dates and location are arranged based on greatest convenience for family members to show up and be comfortable.
Together we accurately measure the dependency needs of those relying on us and find ways to give that are in balance with our financial, spiritual, and systemic values. In this way, exaggerated and hostile dependency are brought down to less toxic and all-consuming levels.
Situations that can be addressed at a customized intensive
- Divorce, suicide, violence, traumatic loss or similar causing strife, discord, and chaos
- Conflicts and emotional difficulties arising in multi-generational family businesses
- Addiction, substance abuse and its destructive effects
- Long-term system effects of unresolved childhood physical or sexual abuse
- Other systemic disruptions, losses, power struggles, battles, feuds, or estrangements